Monday, October 22, 2007

Transition (Part 2)

I believe that sometimes we find books or people because we need them. Whether or not we recognize the need and embrace it is up to us. As my son will be going through his own transition to college, I began thinking about how poorly I have dealt with the transitions in my own life. Wishing to be a better role model and wanting to give him better advice (should he seek it), I have begun reading books on transition.

While I have already read Transitions by William Bridges, Ph.D., and it has had a huge impact, I decided to read Dr. Bridges' memoir, The Way of Transition: Embracing Life's Most Difficult Moments, which is having an even bigger impact. The following quote is from this book.

"Change can happen at any time, but transition comes along when one chapter of your life is over and another is waiting in the wings to make its entrance...You simply cannot imagine a new chapter, but the fact that letting go of one chapter in your life initiates the transition that concludes by beginning another chapter.

"Transition does not require that you reject or deny the importance of your old life, just that you let go of it. Far from rejecting it, you are likely to do better with the ending if you honor the old life for what it did for you. It got you this far. It brought you everything you have. But now --although it may be some time before you are actually comfortable doing so--it is time for you to let go of it. Your old life is over. No matter how much you would like to continue it, rescue it, or fix it, it's time to let it go."


Anonymous said...

Hmmm, seems cool.


marja said...

That really resonates with me right now. I've recently found I had to give up serious photography, including a child photography business, to devote more time to the other things I'm working on. It was painful to do, since photography was always a big part of who I was. But trying to do it all would mean I wouldn't be able to do a good job of anything. Sometimes you just have to leave something important behind - no matter how sad.

JayPeeFreely said...

Change, change, change!

Letting go is hard. I guess I see myself as two people: one before 2001, another after that time.

The first one, as flawed as he was, had some hope and upbeat style.

This one, I struggle to ever truly believe in a good end.

Even though it is right, and everything I read tells me it should work, I get a big fat barrier in mind (and my daily living) that crops up: "you don't deserve it Jason."

You pick some good passages.

Bipolar Wellness Writer said...

I actually thought about you when I was reading this book. I think it could change your the very best way!


Syd said...

Jaepeefreely is right. You do pick great quotes! And you, my dear friend, are right that people, books, songs and quotes often come to us when we need them most.

I've been undergoing a major life transition for the past 2 years. Every time I think it's ended, I realize that I've finished another chapter, but there's still more to come. It's been scary and unsettling at times, but I am convinced that my "second half" (of life) is going to be so much better than the first because of these transitions, not in spite of them.

Thanks for sharing the journey with me!

Bipolar Wellness Writer said...

I couldn't agree more. And I must say that this book is truly the best of the lot. Dr. Bridges had integrated his memoir--the story of his own transitions, his wife's infidelity,and her death from cancer--with his theory about transitions and it's amazingly great!

I, too, am glad that we're on this journey together!