Although I've been writing about anger, a few people whose advice I treasure, have privately emailed me about forgiveness. And it's certainly something to think about. I haven't liked any of the books I've read on forgiveness so I think I'll go to the library and see what's new in the field.
Still, I think "anger" is an important topic for BIPS and non-BIPS alike.
What's interesting to me is that I just looked at the indexes of three books on bipolar disorder--Surviving Manic Depression: A Manual on Bipolar Disorder for Patients, Families and Providers by E. Torry Fuller, M.D. and Michael B. Knable, D.O.; The Bipolar Disorder Survival Guide by David J. Milkowitz, Ph.D.; and New Hope for People with Bipolar Disorder by Jan Fawcett, M.D., and Nancy Rosenfeld--and there's no listing for anger at all.
So I looked further in my home library, and found The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships by Harriet Goldhor Lerner, Ph.D. The following quote is from chapter 1: The Challenge of Anger.
"Anger is a signal, and one worth listening to. Our anger may be a message that we are being hurt, that our rights are being violated, that our needs or wants are not being adequately met, or simply that something is not right...
"Our anger may tell us that we are not addressing an important emotional issue in our lives, or that too much of our self--our beliefs, values, desires, or ambitions--is being compromised in a relationship. Our anger may be a signal that we are doing more and giving more than we can comfortably do or give. Or our anger may warn us that others are doing too much for us, at the expense of our own competence and growth...
"Just as physical pain tells us to take our hand off the hot stove, the pain of our anger preserves the very integrity of our self. Our anger can motivate us to say "no" to the ways in which we are defined by others and "yes" to the dictates of our inner self."